The five reasons why I quit my job (and things you should consider if you feel like quitting yours)

So suddenly, I'm an expert on jobs. A hasty move back to the States made me face a number of realities: I had to get a job, it had to pay well, and it was never going to be like my last one...which I LOVED. So I hastily took another job, which was perfect on paper. I quit three months later. My propensity for updating my gchat status regularly, as well as some drunken facebook wall posts left many people wondering why I quit. I talked to very few people about it, because things got kind of dramatic and I was wearing out the few people I did talk to with the specifics. My bartender (and friend) actually said to me "just stop going to work so you'll stop talking about it."

But whatever, I started a new job.

A friend asked me for pointers on how to make a new employee feel comfortable (he's hiring his own replacement). What I told him, after I said "Tell them you're happy they're here (literally, say 'I'm happy you're here') is that if you feel uncomfortable about anything in the first two hours, you might never shake it.

I'm wrestling with this so much; the organization I worked for did WONDERFUL things for WONDERFUL girls. The job description fit like a glove. What went wrong? Was it all me? Was the transition too much? Maybe.

But not just me. It was a bad work environment, so I quit. Here's why:

1)The Phone
I was set up with a "desk" that didn't have a phone. It's a small non-profit, so at first it wasn't such a big deal, but the constant demand that make phone calls, and the fact that my ED said to me "I don't have time to sit on the phone all day...you do" should have tipped me off that I should move on right away.

2) The Silent Treatment
From the time I gave in my letter (which after I was taken out onto the street and "convinced" to think my decision over for a few days before I did anything drastic...I call this "the most uncomfortable three cigarettes of my life"), the award-winning Executive Director of a respected non-profit just. stopped. speaking to me. Literally, not a single word. She looked at me once, but I think it was a mistake. Maybe she thought I was someone else, like the mail carrier or Mister Softee. But no fuck you, no thank you, nothing. And no, she isn't five years old. Which brings me to number 3.....

3) Founder's Syndrome
Founder's syndrome is a very real, and very dangerous thing. Founders pour their heart and soul and blood and sweat and (insert cliche here) into their work, and ultimately have a difficult time moving on, letting others in, etc. It's like having a baby, getting them past the awkward growing up and then saying "hey, I'm supposed to let go because you might be able to raise my kid better than I can." I get it, I really do. But I'm also very smart, very strong-willed, and very ambitious. I don't always expect to the get what I want, but I do expect to be heard. When a founder can only hear her own words as they bounce around the room and back into her head, we have a problem. And it's time to go.

4) Respect
There are powerful people in life who command respect, and there are no questions. This is not a mutual feeling. These are people like Jeff Sachs and Brett Farve (if you're me)...you respect them, they don't have to respect you. Necessarily.

When you work with people, it's a bit different. You have to remember that they hired you because they thought you were good. While it might be easy to turn it into a "gratitude for giving me the job" situation, that's really not how it works. You are doing something for them, and your resume being plucked from the pile, and your making it to the third interview means that you should be respected. By the founder, executive director, HR staff, whoever. You have already earned it. Any place that puts you into the cycle of "I'm the boss and I get to shit on you and treat you like a moron" is probably always going to treat you that way. If you aren't being respected, demand that respect. If you're good at your job, you deserve it.

Needless to say, the respect that I needed to be successful never came.

5) The job you have vs. the job you want
I think we all fantasize about quitting things. Someone is yelling at you, something is screwed up, someone stole your computer to use your desk for a bagel party and left crumbs all over it....and you want to throw your hands in the air and say "Fine, I'm leaving! Suck it!" But you don't. Or maybe you just dream big, always comparing the job you have with the job you want.

Yeah....that's not what happened with me. I had the job I wanted, it just wasn't the job the organization wanted. They hired someone to fill a position that could not exist in their current structure. This isn't the end of the world, and truth be told a similar thing just happened with my beloved volunteers. It just wasn't my fault, and the blame ultimately fell on me not "being flexible" or "being dishonest". It was really easy to believe that those things were true.

So I got out. Do I know how things are going to turn out at the new place? Nope. Do I think I did the right thing? Yes.

I read the new job description posted for my old position. They altered it quite a bit, made it more realistic. Old co-workers have told me that they are approached about how they're doing, if there is anything that needs to change to make their lives easier. They heard me even if they weren't listening. I think we're all better off.

Four on the Floor: Plaza Italia

I guess I’m continuing my favorite places in Santiago list with another no-brainer/somewhat cheesy place. And I suppose “favorite” is something of an overstatement: I’ve had friends get beaten up and robbed, I had a hooligan try to steal my purse (he really should have gotten it too…he was a very bad thief), and I was once surround by a group of drunks who proceeded to just stare at me and then get closer and closer…like being on the Metro but on a street corner with no one else around (save my taxi driver, who swept me away).

So I should hate Plaza Italia. And yet, there are so many reasons not to:

1) I lived there, and moved in the day that Pinochet died, hauling my belongings into my apartment to the increasing swell of chanting and noise from outside the window.

2) It’s the perfect meeting place, even for clueless gringos in their first week of volunteering.

3) Giant puppets pee in the street.

4) The Paulistano Schoperia – Best place to watch a futbol game….if you’re Brazilian (this is also the scene of the infamous “blondy girl” incident.

5) Dog fights.