My Insanity

You might be asking yourself (probably not, since I doubt anyone is reading this) why is this girl posting about a trip that hasn't happened yet? Well, I'm so glad you asked because I happen to have an answer.

It is no secret that I've been rather insane lately. Crying at my desk for no reason, throwing fits, ratting on my co-workers to HR...this is my life right now. I had no idea that this would happen, as I've been looking forward to (read: fantasizing about) this trip for six months. SIX MONTHS! It was this awesome distant thing that I was going to do that would change my life, and do some good, and get me the hell out of New York City for while.

And its here. It started. We had this shindig last Thursday night, and I met all the organization people who had just been fuzzy pictures on the Internet (which I compulsively check) and email addresses. We raised money and talked about the orgnization. We ate and drank (I'm fairly sure I drank too much both times we hung out....good job Lauren!) together, and the whole thing finally has a face. Well, a bunch of faces. Faces that look just like mine: 25 and full of ideas and hope and energy. Suddenly I am part of something that makes a lot of sense to me, that isn't corporate and drowning in money and promoting a completely false sense of commitment to the greater good. Its real, and I'm scared out of my mind. The scariest thing of all is the fact that I might fail, and since I've publicized the heck out of this trip everyone will know about it if I do.

Perhaps I should have thought of that before starting this blog.

First post is the hardest...

Well kids, now I'm doing something I swore I'd never do. I'm blogging. I'm a blogger. How on earth did this happen?

Its all about the trip, of course. I've had to explain myself over and over again. "What are you doing in Chile?" and "What do you mean you aren't going to get paid?" are questions I hear everyday. Everyday. From my parents.

My plan was to send emails every few weeks, chock full of little anecdotes about the trip, about the kids and about the other volunteers. A good idea, and way for me to document the experience. I am a very selfish person afterall.

But then I thought, maybe people don't really want to hear from me every few weeks. Perhaps they should check in when they feel like it. Like...a blog. And then I realized that the bloggers had won. They changed the way people communicate. I enjoy communication, so I'm going to join them.

So here it is! Three weeks until I take the pluge, get on the plane and lose my income. If I only I could figure out what to pack.....